Monday, May 7, 2012


Raat k dhaaee baje ghadi bhi so chuki thi, humne Shastri ke ghar se alvida kiya aur jab neeche utar kar bike k paas pahuche toh maajra samjh mein aaya. Bike jo giri padi thi, uthaya toh usne bhi thodi saans li. Nirlajon ne dedh sau gram petrol bhi nahi chhoda tha, aisa lag raha tha mano bike k saath gang rape hua ho. Pandrah minute koshish karne k paschaat jab petrol pipe lagane mein hum na-kaamyab rahe tab Yadav ne, pipe kaise fit kiya ja sakta hai, ye samajhne ki koshish google mein shuru kar di. Jab google aur wikipedia bhi haar gaye tab hamne socha k chalo, ab ghar magic hour mein hi niklenge. Hum wapis Shastri k ghar jaa hi rahe the k kuchh log raaste k ek kone par thandi beer ka maza lete nazar aaye. Humne kaha chalo ek baar inse bhi baat karke dekhte hain, shayad kuchh madad mil jaye. Hum unke paas pahuche, apna kissa sunaya toh unmein se ek banda jiske paanv mein plaster do din pehle hi cricket match mein catch lete waqt laga tha, uth khada hua. Chaar log aur apni apni beer aur tippanniyaa/ raai lekar pahuche. Kuchh der mein jab unki beer utri toh unmein se ek ne kaha k bhai munna mechanic toh yahi peechhe rehta hai usse bulao, jaise hi ye humne suna toh Yadav aur meri nazrein muskura uthi. Langde tyagi ne Munna ko bulaya. Badi mashaqqat k baad usneendi haalat mein Munna Mechanic ne pravesh kiya aur uske aate hi sab peechhe hat gaye. Paas padi beer k do ghoont lagane k baad Munna ne gaadi ko pal bhar k liye bhanpa aur jhoomte huye bola k screw driver lao, usne pehle hi addhi chadhaaee huyi thi. Thakker ki gaadi mein screw driver bhi, bade size k nikle, saale ne yahan bhi apni gujju akal lagayi. Ab maamla sangeen ho chuka tha, Munna full form mein aa chuka tha. Usne doosre taraf se pipe ko jaise taise palbhar mein hi jod diya. Sabki aankhein chaundhiya gayi, sab stabdh reh gaye. Hum sab iss soch mein pad gaye k ye kaise ho gaya. Munna ne aakhir, kar dikhaya. Gaadi chaalu ho gayi. Jaate jaate Munna ne Langde tyagi ki beer k do ghoont aur lagaye aur bola k seedhe andheri teshan jao aur pehle petrol bharao. Hamare paas usse dene k liye koi shabd nahi the aur paise lene se usne inkaar kar diya. Phir hamne Langde tyagi se usse bolne ko kaha k ye uski mehnat ki kamaaee hai, tab kahi jaakar usne paise liye.
Hamne rukh kiya andheri teshan ki ore. Petrol pump pahuchne se pehle hi gaadi band pad gayi. Jaise taise hum gaadi ghaseet-te huye pump pahuche, jaan mein jaan aayi. Petrol bhar waya aur turant ghar k liye ravana huye. Ghadi, jo iss sab ke chalte jaag chuki thi, usneendi haalat mein sava teen baja rahi thi. Goregaon flyover par gaadi ne phir aankh micholi khelna shuru kar diya tha aur woh aakhirkaar phir band pad gayi. Iss baar hamein kuchh samajh nahi aaya. Yadav ki laakh koshishon k baad bhi woh shuru nahi hui. Dimaag k parkhachche ud chuke the kyunki ghar abhi paas hote huye bhi bahut duur tha. Thodi der flyover par gaadi ghaseetne k baad jab dhalaan aayi toh humne slo-mo shots ka anand liya. Thandi havaayein, bagal se sau ki speed mein nikalti gaadiyan aur bees-tees ki speed se ludhakte hum. Kaafi dilchasp nazara tha. Hum, andaaz apna apna k Amar-Prem lag rahe the. Do deewane shehar mein, hum gana gaate gaate jab ludhakte huye neeche pahuche toh dhalaan khatm hone k saath gaadi khadi ho gayi. Mann kiya k thakker ki gaadi ko yahin chhod dete hain. Kabhi hum gaaliyan Thakker ko toh kabhi uski gaadi ko dete. Yadav ne gaadi phir se shuru karne ki thaani par woh bhool gaya k abki baar thakker ki gaadi petrol se nahi, khaakhre- theple se hi chalegi. Humne phirse ghaseetna shuru kiya.Kuchh der baad adhmari haalat mein hum Oberoi mall pahuche. Bhookh kaafi badh chuki thi, kisi bhi idli ya coffee wale ka kahin koi nishaan nahi tha. Pyaas bhi itni lag rahi thi k ek baar toh mann kiya k paseena hi pi jayein. Oberoi mall se ghar ki doori agar paidal chalkar tai karein toh pandrah se bees minute, bus se agar tai karein toh saat se aath minute aur chalti haalat ki bike se agar tai karein toh chaar se paanch minute. Baharhaal humne paidal, bike k saath kabhi ye safar tai nahi kiya tha toh iska koi andaaza nahi tha. Chadhaan bahut zyada thi. Kuchh der aur mann maar k gaadi ghaseeti toh dindoshi pahuche. Aisa mehsus hua k maano chaar-dhaam ki yaatra karke laute ho. Thoda ruke toh duur ek coffee wala nazar aaya. Dil wapis garden garden hone laga, achanak shareer ko shakti mili aur hum coffee wale k paas pahuche. Sabse pehle toh hum dus minute ped k neeche let gaye, saans jab kaabu mein aa gayi toh humne paani piya aur phir coffee. Nazar ghumaaee toh ghadi bhi auron ki tarah apni morning walk k liye nikal chuki thi. Kutton ne bhaunkna band kar diya tha, dhoodhwale apni dukaan khol rahe the aur paper wale rozmarra ki tarah, road par hi apna dhandha phaila chuke the.
Coffee ki chuskiyon k baad jab dobara himmat badhi toh akhirkaar marte marte hi sahi hum ghar pahuche. Abtak ghadi bhi apni morning walk se wapas aa chuki thi aur sava paanch baja rahi thi. Gaadi ko compound mein khadi karne k baad pal bhar k liye humne gaadi ko dekha, Yadav aur main, dono ekbar muskuraaye aur gaadi ko tata-bye bye karke apne apne gharon ki aur nikal pade. Akhirkaar hamne fateh haasil kar hi li aur iss tarah ye qissa yahan khatm hua.

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